Tobias Gregory... age 5

(Best viewed at full screen.. tee hee)

5 years ago today, a little miracle happened. Tobias Gregory Neff (named for his awesome Grampa Greg whose birthday is just days apart from Toby's) was born. He wasn't planned of this earth, but he was planned by God. His pregnancy was a hard one and we almost lost him during week 12. They called him a threatened miscarriage. But God's will was for this child to be born.

He came via c-section at 37 weeks due to severe Gastro-intestinal distress on my part and severe preclampsia. I had gained 6lbs in 3 days on toast. So the Dr. said, let's have this baby tomorrow.

I could have kissed him straight on the mouth!

Alexis Kimball came and took the kids for me (March 01 Board) and then Tobias came. I remember little about his actual birth but I know that I could FEEL them during the c-section. Not the pain, but I could feel their touch. Weird.

So after they sewed me up I went to recovery and told myself instead of worrying about getting to my baby, I would rest. Ha! Because they pumped me soo full of anesthesia, as I was falling asleep... I would forget I needed to breath. And ALL my monitors would go off and the nurse would shake me and say, "Honey, you need to remember to breath."

So... no rest for me.

After the pain meds wore off I was a little loopy and had that lovely post anesthesia itch... *scratch scratch*

But my boy was perfect... huge and perfect. He weighed in at 8lbs 14oz and was 21 inches long (I think... is it bad I don't remember???). When my mom saw pics, she immediately stated she thought I had Gestational Diabetes because the boy was swollen and huge. LOL I don't doubt I did... I had a lot of things go wrong that pregnancy.



When Iona and Gabriel got back to the room after being with Alexis, (a complete God Send!!!) they were just enamored with Toby.

Gabriel was only 23 months old... Iona was was 3.5 years old... and they loved touching his nose and eyes.

Eye, Eye... Gabriel would say and poke him in the eye. It was soo cute. Iona wanted a turn RIGHT away on feeding him. I couldn't breast feed so he was on a bottle right away. So we set her up to feed him and she had a blast! Look at the smile on her face, she was sooo delighted and proud of herself that she was feeding him. Most of what she fed him went down his shirt but it didn't matter she was a big sister again!

Note her bangs... 3 days prior she decided to cut her own hair. I was soo upset because I knew Toby would come soon and she would look silly for the pictures... Ahhhh! Now they are just too cute.. looking back.

Immediately she was such a good sister. Helping mommy whenever she could and doing what she was asked the first time. It was great.

Gabriel on the other hand... he just liked poking Toby. I think he was trying to figure out if this thing was real. And he loved love loved to kiss Toby! I got the picture of him reaching over the bassinet at the hospital to kiss Toby. I even got video. It was sooo precious! He was a proud brother, even if he didn't know what a brother was at that point.


When we got him home, things were hard. But Toby was an excellent sleeper. More so then Gabriel had been. And in Gabe's defense, he did have some pretty nasty reflux when he was little. And that whole love language thing started when he was just tiny. Touch. So he was most comfy in people's arms. And with another small child. Yah... that didn't work so well.

So Toby eased into our house quickly. And soon after my mom and sisters showed up to welcome him! Therein came our first trial.

He wasn't gaining weight. And all his stools were watery. The Dr's at Ellsworth were not pleased and I struggled with the fact that I thought something was really wrong with my baby boy.

He would eat just fine, but he would soil his diaper 100 times a day. And if I didn't change him he would bleed.

It was terrible.

So rewind a little to the other two. I started Iona out on Enfamil and after a bout with what we thought was Colic we realized she wasn't tolerating cows milk. So we switched her to soy. Same issues with Gabriel (only a little more severe and in the hospital I actually thought he was going to die the way he was acting. It was a scary time. But we figured it out and switched him to soy).

So in knowing this fine fact, the obvious choice for my son is soy. Duhh, doesn't take a brain surgeon to deduce this one.

However, My dear Toby was severely allergic to soy. And the moment I switched him to Enfamil, he gained weight and his wet stools stopped.

Phew! Major crisis averted.

Well then all the family left and it was just us... but Toby had picked up a cold brought to us by one of the cousins. Oh brother, a cold already, I thought.

Well turns out it was worse then a cold.

RSV.

So at 4 weeks old my precious little miracle was hospitalized. I felt like I needed to be there by his side and THANKFULLY (and I get tears just thinking about it) Melissa T came to my rescue. She barely knew me from Joe Schmoe but she took in my kids and didn't charge me a single cent. I really have tears thinking about it. We had a chance meeting because she put a Pampered Chef invitation in my door one day blindly. And my mom and I went to her party and she was a wonderful woman (and still is) and she was the ONLY person I even remotely knew. And I had only met her days before he was hospitalized. But yet she took in my kids and showed me just how AWESOME military family can be. (Thanks Melissa, Sniff sniff)

I worried about my kids (I knew they were safe but you always worry) and prayed for my infant son. We had been in the hospital 8 days and he had showed very very little improvement. The drs and nurses would come in hoping for the best and leaving with down faces. He was just NOT getting better.

I wondered why. Wondered again if this was going to be the place I left him and just couldn't understand why God would allow him to leave me so soon, if that was his will. But I accepted it and cried and prayed over him.

So here we are on the 8th day and I decided to take out my scrapbooks and I thought, I wonder if little Toby would enjoy looking at the pictures. Though he probably didn't understand who or what they were. There were faces, big faces of his siblings and he might enjoy that.

WOW! What a difference this made to this little boy who seemingly wasn't getting better. And I don't think it was a coincidence, but from that moment forward he showed MARKED improvement in EVERYTHING! And on the morning of day 10, he was released from Rapid City Regional Hospital to go home.

I cried tears of joy! My baby was going home!

I wish I could say his struggles ended there. But in the next year of his life, he had not 1, not 2, not even 3 cases of pneumonia -- but 5!! Thankfully the Dr's at the base were quick to treat him and we got a neb machine for home so that when he got a cold things would stop getting out of hand. But he didn't stop getting that sick until after he was a year old.

So that brings us down the 4 year road. And I am happy to report, other then the common illness here and there... he has never had pneumonia since! We use our neb machine when he gets croopy sounding and it never progresses any further.

Hooray!

He is a healthy, happy 5 year old with an attitude. Sooo fun... Soooo tempered... soo much like mom. LOL

He enjoys torturing everyone with his attitude... and is sooo witty already. Sarcastic at times, like dad. But he makes us crack up on a daily basis. He is just awesome.

So while he had a rough start to life... he is now doing awesome and having a great time just being Toby.

Now that the post is novel length, here are some semi-recent pics of my baby. The 5 year old who lights up everyone's life... anyone he comes in contact with smiles. Wouldn't you?

Happy Birthday Toby!!!